Assume a virtue if you have it not,
Thou gleeking unwash’d pignut.
Thou wither’d old apple-john.
I shall live to knock thy brains out,
Thou rank, full-gorged hedge-pig.
Thou yeasty, motley-minded strumpet.
O flesh, flesh, how art thou fishified and smell of calumny.
Thou art fitter to be worn in my cap than to wait at my heels,
Thou whoreson mandrake.
Thou currish, ill-breeding, crook-pated coxcomb!
Set thy lower part where thy nose stands,
Thou wimpled flax-wench!
Your virginity breeds mites, much like a cheese.
A weasel hath not such a deal of spleen as you are toss’d with.

"Troth, and your bum is the greatest thing about you; so that, in the beastliest sense, you are Pompey the Great." ~ Escalus, Measure for Measure, by William Shakespeare